Old Poem IV

I thought I saw something

I thought I saw familiar

I thought I heard the wings of a great bird take flight

I thought I could smell sweetness

the way things smell when they are fresh and growing

I thought I may have even felt a new emotion.

A child lives with a woman’s eyes but,

the eyes are childlike in vision

something different is something new

growth cannot be forgotten, it is part of a change in time.

To relax and float is not as easy as it looks

even scary, like shapes and sounds in the night

we sometimes attack nothing really

as the familiar stands all too close for comfort.

Don't look back my friend, you might see something

something that I thought I saw.

Old Poetry III

Empathy is as strong as it is real
no less fragile was the feeling that moved with it.
 So, with two no-longer in balance, another change takes place.
emotion runs not as deep,
remembering and learning from the pains of the past.
Less nourishment is required
a smaller space is occupied.
I fight the allowance of complete happiness now,
for a past when it was good with you.

I am a product of my environment
and can adapt in most situations.
You touched me
we walked where I hadn't before.
we created new markers for my emotional standards
Now, I teeter with uncertainty locked in conflict.
A new balance must be within reach soon or
I may truly go mad.

Some days, as if it is any help
I hide in my notebook and for get the day
close my eyes to dream.

As though by design,
I feel empathic with you
and for the moment
without reservation
memories return and may are no weaker for their time spent sleeping
but, energized by beliefs that are true and sure
for as long as they last.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Don't be afraid 

Let me tell you what I'm afraid of:

I'm afraid you're the best thing in my life

I'm afraid I sometimes take for granted our friendship and closeness

I'm afraid that our love might change

I'm afraid if you wanted to

you could cut my soul,

afraid of the pain I would feel

another loss I would know.

I'm afraid of your dreams

I'm afraid that I even think about that.

I only tell you this

to tell myself

and recognize the vulnerabilities of the human heart

All joy cannot be put in only one place.

without you

my world lacks joy

and I don't know what to do about that.

There's a sadness that vials me

a certain sorrow that sits behind my eyes

You say, love you today if that's what makes me happy

Well today it hurts and that's what

I'm most afraid of.

 

 

Old Poetry II

     A girl leads a goat down to the river.
Fog patches ease into the tiny valleys.
Fear chases love away.

     But does it flee for its life or find close cover
and spy from a safer distance?
Will you come back if I open my hand?
     The music is saucy and good. 
I still enjoy watching you move.
Light another candle please.

     Kitty cat comes to rest on the step.
Don't feed her or she will surely stay.
I see you behind that rock. It's brighter than all the rest.
I'll be down by the river in you choose
watching the water shift the stones.

Old Poetry I - The Inspiration of Love

Doing crazy things

not doing anything at all

Getting lost out in the world

Discovering universes within the human heart

Having the strength to move mountains

being open enough to surrender

Getting nose to nose in opposition

being the only one I can really talk to

All the colors of the rainbow painted on a silken summer scarf

wind or rain it beams of joy

and all other emotions that brush against 

The Inspiration of Love

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Morning comes again and the phone has not rung

I pick it up just to be sure

 reality bites

 for a moment, I am silent and sad, the day begins.

  my heart, has no one to speak with,

nothing to share, you're no-longer there.

3am

The moon came by and said 'Hi'.

Sleep was soft beneath the covers

Hopes chance falls onto the pillow

till the dim hours of dawn steel away the time that you might call in the night.

Purity has worn out its welcome.

Memories gather in the shadows of another time

between the dark and the light

it remains a simple thing to find,

to fight,

with all that wants to continue being in love with you.

You pulled away

I fell away

that was the plan

the woman knew, the child

may never understand

we stood about, both capture and prisoner

reluctant to ask any questions

thinking about it would not be safe traveling 

what answer could I possibly reach for if I fell?

So, I say 'Hello" to the moon once more

and call on certainty

that a voice in the night 

someday 

I will no-longer wait for.